Hell is a teenage girl...

Okay, so it's been awhile since I last updated my blog but I have only come here to vent.

I have come to vent about my feelings on dating

So please feel free to comment on what a stereotypical teenage girl I'm being

Anyway, there's this guy I like who has a girlfriend. A pretty girlfriend. No, not pretty a freaking gorgeous girlfriend who is one the kindest popular girls around. I don't really know her that well but I can assure you that she seems quite civil in fact. She reads huge thick books and owns a Samsung phone. She is just an all around great girl. Cheesy? Yeah I figured as much.

So the guy is like one of "those" guys. He's the type that when you look at him you wouldn't really believe that he could get any girl he wanted. He's kind of skinny and tall. He also seems to have an interest in anime, action and horror movies. He also likes Yo Mama. He also hates me. Or at least I think he hates me. Being a stereotypical teenage girl, I am prone to believing that my crush probably hates me if he doesn't speak to me. Cheesy? Yeah I figured as much.

Well the point is that Girl A is in fact dating Boy B. The subject in question has been going on for about a month already. It's really cute. But being the stereotypical teenage girl that I am, I believe that in trying to convince myself that he is happy with another girl, I will get over him. Crazy, right? Yeah I figured as much.

Boy B can also play guitar and I bet that he plays it for her. He can also dance  and I bet he dances with her. Boy B can make a pretty good drink, but I bet he makes it for her. Boy B would never want me, but I bet that he always wanted her. Paranoid? Yeah I figured as much.

So seeing as I have to stick to this sort of theme for the majority of the week, I shall start by confessing my true feelings to Boy B...even though he will NEVER get to see this...

DEAR BOY B

Ahem. I haven't really been vocal about the way I feel. All that really matters is that I kinda...maybe...sort of...like you. I've liked you since the end of Form 1 and ever since then, my heart skips a beat every-time I see you.

Please don't think that I'm weird but I must admit, there are a few things I've said that I'm not so proud of. Like how you're an idiot and how you annoy the living hell out of me. I love how you always compliment my artwork and I must admit, half of them I've drawn while thinking of you. I was constantly trying to impress and you just made me feel more secure. And now you're making someone else feel loved and I don't feel comfortable with it. Sorry...

My favorite memory was when you sat behind me at the lockers and you tried to steal my art book. My friends just went ON and ON about it. I pretended to hate it but I secretly loved it. The fact that you find my crap pretty awesome is quite surreal. I remember how we went through a whole term of poking each other and I got all wobbly in the knees cos you were near me. Every-time I see you my heart skips a beat for a second and I start to feel flustered and can't really say much. I tend to stare at you too often and blush (if black people CAN blush!) and I also tend to shy away from any contact with you.

So basically I wish that that was me with your ring on my finger(er, thumb). I wish that were me running my fingers through your hair. I wish it were me getting along well with your adorable siblings. I wish I could have the chance to be with you forever; to be your first and last. I wish you would play guitar for me and dance with me across the stage(even though I can't dance for shit!). I wish that you would hold me close and whisper in my ear that you love me. I wish that you could hold my hand and walk me home, or play with my hair and say it's nice even though it's not mine. I wish we could play video games all day, sit in silence in the walkway enjoying each others company, watch horror movies and anime together and make fun of our friends together. I wish you could give me long tight hugs, lend me your jacket when I'm cold, laugh at my VERY crappy jokes...smile at me x) Squeeze my cheeks and kiss them when I cry. I wish that we were more than the nothing that we are now. I want people to be like, "DAMN! They're still together?!" or, "What a cute couple." We could be the awesome kick-ass couple that everyone envies.

Point is...I kinda...sort of...maybe...like you. And I hope that she doesn't break your heart. Maybe someday I'll get over you and find someone else to swoon over...but I can't...at least, I THINK that I can't.

SIGNED FROM A REALLY LOVE-STRUCK GIRL THAT YOU NEVER NOTICE

Stereotypical teenage girl? Yeah, I figured as much. -_-